In early 2006 I had the idea of creating a website that would store my important information and if something happened to me it would send it off to the people who needed it. I was the root admin for several companies at the time and if something happened to me the companies were SCREWED so I thought this was a good idea. In July of ’06 I came up with the name DeathVault and started a 3 and a half yeah procrastination fest. Every now and again I’d work on some code and even paid to have the logo made but there was a problem. People didn’t get it when I explained it to them or they hated the name or something that would turn me off it. I was in a mode where I was listening to other people’s feedback instead of listening to my own gut. So I sat on it. Now this could be a coincidence but probably not, but a company about a block away from my office launched a site that had a similar name and identical goal 2 years later. This is after I’d been talking to people about the idea and it had gotten around. The site got a ton of press as being a revolutionary idea and my heart sunk even more and I sat on it yet again.
After all this time I was finally ready to get it built last year. I had the time blocked off and was ready to go but there was another thing that was in the back of my mind that was bothering me even more than all the feedback I had gotten and that was a deep superstition that if I finished this site I’d actually DIE. I mean it’s ridiculous but I had this dread of a universal irony god smiting me because I made a service that only works when you’re dead. I was also worried that I might live my life just slightly differenly enough to put me in a situation where I might get killed and not have the will to fight because I knew all my affairs were in order. Totally irrational superstitous bullshit but it weighed on me. And the fact that the whole concept is just flat out depressing. So it’s with a song in my heart and a spring in my step that I’m officially dumping the idea to make some more psychic space in my brain for new and exciting things and not worrying about eventually getting it done because after 3.5 years it’s pretty damn obvious it’s never going to happen. I’m also going to use this as a GIANT lesson to myself to never listen to negative feedback and to strike while the iron is hot. An expensive lesson since I put in about $750 into the site but we live and we learn… And sometimes letting go can be the best thing to do.
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